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Our Father is Not Custodial

I was speaking with some friends over a Skype conference last night. It was the last of 4 meetings some great men and I had over Robin’s book “The Healing Path.” I have many thoughts brewing from that extended conversation but for now I just want to mention a word. It was a word a wrote on my notes pages a couple weeks ago in a previous group chat appointment. The word is custodial. The word was mentioned in the context, I believe, of learning to receive the Father’s love and understand his affection for us as something greater and deeper than simply custodial.

Webster’s says about custodial: relating to, providing, or being protective care or services for basic needs. In another online dictionary one of the first definitions for custodial reads: Marked by care and supervision rather than efforts to cure. This is not the love of the Father. This takes us back into our conversations about orphanhood. The orphan spirit has settled for a view of the Father that is simply custodial. He loves us (the orphan heart says) probably, but is primarily concerned with our basic needs, our protection from harm, and in our supervision. When we receive this kind of fathering, then what we relay to others is, in that same order, statements of love like:

1. I am concerned with your basic needs, not your dreams or your wants. Let’s not trouble each other or God with anything other than survival level provision. If you complain you are being selfish.
2. I want to keep you from getting hurt so let’s be clear on what you are doing wrong, and how you can avoid sin. Let’s also make sure you stay inside the fence in our group so we can keep you safe.
3. I want to bring order into your life since life before Christ for you must have been chaos. Let me help you understand how we will live, think, act, and behave so that can all maintain order and peace in our community of relationships and in our meetings.

This reminds me of the parable in Matthew 25 where the landowner leaves three servants in charge of his property. (Matt. 25:14) Jumping to the last servant we find someone who believed that his master was custodial. In keeping with this identity he was custodial with his master’s property. He made sure it didn’t lack basic safe storage and he made sure it was in a proper place. The parable says about him, “But the man who had received the one talent [amount of money] went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money.” When the master came back to get a report the servant replied, “‘Master,’ he said, ‘I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.’” The master was abhorent. He was shocked that the servant would do something so terrible. He called him a wicked lazy servant and in disgust he took all of his property back from this useless servant and gave it to a servant who was going to be responsible with it. What is the key lesson?

Our heavenly Father is not custodial with us, and we, in turn as his sons, are not ever to consider being custodial with those in our care.

God’s valuable property is always people. So go back and read the parable in Matthew 25:14-30 and insert the word people for the word talents and see what happens to the insights! No wonder the master was fuming mad! We don’t take care of God’s people by hiding them in the ground, in a safe, in an organization, in a club, and teaching them to stay put and keep their heads down. We don’t honor God’s heart when we express to them that we are interested only in keeping them safe, keeping them in order, and keeping them in their place. First of all these people are not ours to own. They belong to the master. He has asked to steward their growth and maturity. He has asked us, according to Ephesians 4, to build up the saints so they will be fit for service and can grow mature into Christ. They have never been ours to control or to corral.

I wish I had more time, but this is just a blog post. Maybe we can spend more time later. In keeping with our thought process let’s go back to those three things we saw the custodial spirit does and now let’s relay what the Father heart of God says to us, and in turn what we can relay to others:

1. Don’t be concerned with your basic level of provision as I have that covered with ease. I love you more than the flowers in the field and they have never worried one day. Let’s instead talk about your dreams and what stirs your heart to act in this world. Let’s dream together about new exploits, new ways of helping others, exciting ways for you to become the most amazing version of your self!
2. Yes, it is true, as we go on these adventures you are going to get hurt. Just like kids skin their knees when they ride bikes, kingdom grown ups will get hurt in the sport of loving others. Loving others and pursuing your dreams will run you into all kinds of hurts, and frustrations, and disappointments. Instead of trying to avoid them why don’t we make a better contract. Why don’t we choose to go together, so whether you fly or whether you crash, you will have a comrade in the adventure.
3. True order in a sons life is to carry the heart and DNA of his Father. I am not interested in handing you a rule book. The Bible is not a rule book, rather, it is a handbook for relationship. I want you to trust me. Let’s go together into the rest of your life and I will show you everything you need to know in real time. I won’t hand you a rule book because you might go off and read that by yourself, I am more interested in growing our intimacy and trust. All the proper order in the universe has been established this way.

You see, these kinds of statements are kingdom statements. They are full of risk and love. Full of adventure and trust. Full of responsibility and honor. Remember, in Matthew 25 the faithful servants did these things well. They went out and risked on behalf of people’s best futures and as a result the Father came back to find an increase. He found more people, more maturity, more strength, more sonship growing in his fields! Friends, what have you been planting? What have you been watering? What have you been investing into the Father’s fields? Is sonship and faith growing in you and in those around you?

It is your time to see to it.

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